I, Robot... You, Jane

"I, Robot...You, Jane" is the eighth episode of season 1 of the television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The episode was written by staff writers Ashley Gable and Thomas A. Swyden, and directed by Stephen Posey. The episode originally aired on The WB on April 28, 1997.

In this episode, Buffy and Giles face a demon spirit who has been trapped since the Dark Ages and is unleashed into cyberspace. Meanwhile, Willow has fallen for a cyber-beau whom she met online and Xander and Buffy are wary of who this anonymous wooer may turn out to be.^[1]

In 1418, in a castle in Cortona, Italy, Carlo kneels before his master, Moloch. Moloch promises Carlo everything in exchange for his love. When Carlo pledges his love, Moloch kills him. In a monastery, several priests form the sacred Circle of Kayless to trap the demon Moloch inside a book. The head priest (Pierrino Mascarino) seals the book in a box, hoping it will never be read to prevent Moloch from returning to the world.

In the present day, Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) opens the box with the book, and Giles (Anthony Head) tells her to put it in a pile. A group of computer science students are helping Jenny Calendar (Robia LaMorte) scan books in the library, and she tries to convince Giles that computers are the new way of life. When Willow (Alyson Hannigan) stays after class to scan Moloch's book, the script disappears from the pages. She saves her work and leaves the library, and soon the text "Where am I?" appears on the computer screen.

A week later, at school, Willow tells Buffy that she has started an online relationship with a boy named Malcolm. Buffy warns Willow about the dangers of rushing into a relationship with someone she has not seen. Moloch eavesdrops on their conversation through a webcam and messages Fritz to keep watch on Buffy. Ms. Calendar questions Fritz about the unusual amount of time he and Dave (Chad Lindberg) have spent on the computer and receives an ambiguous answer.

Xander (Nicholas Brendon) invites Willow to go to the Bronze, but she declines, wanting to talk to Malcolm. Buffy accuses Xander of being jealous. He denies it, claiming he is just worried about Willow because they have no idea if Malcolm is who he says he is. Elsewhere, Fritz repeats, "I'm jacked in," as he slices his arm in the form of the letter "M."

When Willow is late the next day, Buffy discovers she skipped classes to talk to Malcolm. Suspecting that Malcolm might be catfishing Willow, Buffy asks Dave for help in finding out Malcolm's real identity. Dave's angry response causes her to suspect that he is Malcolm. When Buffy asks Giles for help, he confesses he can't help her since he finds computers intimidating. His only idea is for Buffy to follow Dave. As Buffy follows him to the CRD building, a security camera points at her, and a message appears on Fritz's computer screen: "Kill her."

Back in the library, Buffy and Giles are surprised Xander knows that CRD is Calax Research and Development, a high-tech company that shut down. Xander assures them it is suspicious because he would have known if CRD reopened, and they decide to break in. When Ms. Calendar interrupts them, she expresses surprise at how much time they spend in the library. Xander and Buffy make an excuse and quickly leave.

During an online chat with Malcolm, Willow becomes suspicious after she learns that he knows Buffy was kicked out of her old school and logs off the conversation. Back at the library, Ms. Calendar calls Giles a snob due to his aversion to computers, and they begin to argue. Suddenly, she notices that the pages in Moloch's book are blank, prompting Giles to rush inside his office.

In the quad, Dave tells Buffy that Willow wants to talk to her in the girl's locker room in a plot to electrocute Buffy. Dave changes his mind at the last minute and warns Buffy, who uses her Slayer reflexes to evade the shock. In an empty classroom, Dave pleads with Moloch that he can't kill Buffy because it is wrong. Moloch begins writing Dave's suicide note on the computer. Suddenly, Fritz appears behind Dave and kills him.

In the library, Giles tells Buffy and Xander that Moloch is a powerful demon who wins his victims over with false promises of love, glory, and power. In the Dark Ages, books were often used to imprison demons, but if the books were read, the demons were set free. They realize Moloch has gotten into the Internet after the scanner "read" his book and can now cause a limitless amount of damage. Buffy tries to delete the "Moloch" file, but his face appears on the screen and warns her to stay away from Willow. Buffy realizes "Malcolm" is Moloch.

After Buffy finds Dave's body, she tells Giles to ask Ms. Calendar for help, hoping they can find a way to imprison Moloch again with his knowledge of demons and her knowledge of computers. Xander and Buffy leave for Willow's house. When Willow arrives home, she receives an email from Moloch stating that he can no longer wait and needs to see her. Willow ignores it and goes downstairs to answer the door, where she is kidnapped by Fritz.

In the library, Giles is surprised that Ms. Calendar knows about Moloch, and she admits to being a technopagan. Meanwhile, in Willow's bedroom, Buffy and Xander find the email from Moloch and head to the CRD building to search for her. Buffy calls Giles, and they coordinate plans.

Inside CRD, a team of technicians has built Moloch a robot body, and he is happy to see Willow. Moloch kills Fritz as a demonstration of his power. Buffy and Xander break into CRD as Giles and Ms. Calendar prepare the binding spell. The spell casts Moloch out of the Internet and traps him inside his robotic body. As Moloch attacks Xander and Willow, Buffy tricks him into punching a high-voltage power line, causing Moloch to explode.

The next day, Giles returns an earring to Ms. Calendar that he found in the library. He tells her about his fondness for the way books smell, and she surprises him by being flirtatious. Meanwhile, Willow feels miserable that Malcolm turned out to be a demon. Buffy tries to cheer her up by reminding her that the guy she had a crush on turned out to be a vampire, while Xander had the hots for a giant praying mantis. They reason that the Hellmouth is messing with their love lives and joke about how none of them will ever find true happiness. Their laughter quickly gives way to worry at the thought.

The title simultaneously refers to Isaac Asimov's I, Robot and Tarzan the Ape Man, in which Tarzan allegedly says, "Me Tarzan, you Jane."^[1]

"I, Robot... You, Jane" was first broadcast on The WB on April 28, 1997. It received a Nielsen rating of 2.3 on its original airing.^[2]

Vox ranked it at #142 on their "Every Episode Ranked From Worst to Best" list of all 144 episodes (to mark the 20th anniversary of the show), writing, "The internet is possessed by a demon robot, and wow are we in 1997. 'I, Robot' is the first episode to really spotlight Willow, and she's such a lovely and complex character that saddling her with this piece of '90s low kitsch is a bit of a letdown. On the plus side, it also introduces us to Jenny Calendar."^[3]

Noel Murray of The A.V. Club was critical of the episode, giving it a grade of D+ because it was "corny, tonally off and lacking even the illusion of depth that other slack episodes have provided in Season One". He felt that it was "frustrating in its lack of extra levels, because there are so many places that episode could've gone", and also found some "odd" things about the episode, such as the sudden appearance of other students in the library. However, he was positive towards the final scene and Ms. Calendar.^[4] DVD Talk's Phillip Duncan was more positive, writing that "What could have easily been a silly plot is made all the better with an excellent set-up, the introduction of another key player, and the continued focus on characters other than Buffy."^[5] A review from the BBC was also positive, writing, "Although the plot is rather tired and seems to belong to the Cyberspace-obsessed eighties, it's given a unique Buffy The Vampire Slayer spin or three to create a very satisfying episode." The review praised the focus on Willow and the way Moloch was presented.^[6]

Rolling Stone ranked "I, Robot... You, Jane" at #129 on their "Every Episode Ranked From Worst to Best" list, writing there are only a few times when Buffy the Vampire Slayer is actively bad, "but sadly, this episode here is one of them. Our first Willow-centric episode (and by far the weakest) is so tragically 1990s it’s almost laughable. A demon has escaped into the internet, intent on wreaking havoc while amassing followers, including Willow, who is unaware of his true identity. Everyone’s favorite soon-to-be-witch deserved so much better than this, but thankfully, her character would undergo infinitely more exploration in the future."^[7]

"I, Robot... You, Jane" was ranked at #131 on Paste Magazine's "Every Episode Ranked" list^[8] and #133 on BuzzFeed's "Ranking Every Episode" list.^[9]

1.^ The website This Day in Quotes explains, "It's a misquote because Weissmuller didn't actually say the line in that film or any of the other Tarzan movies he starred in between 1932 and 1948. Nor does the line "Me Tarzan, you Jane" appear in any of the original Tarzan stories or books written by Edgar Rice Burroughs. But Weissmuller did say it, jokingly, in an interview published in the June 1932 issue of Photoplay magazine. He told the Photoplay reporter: "I didn't have to act in Tarzan, the Ape Man — just said, 'Me Tarzan, you Jane.' After that, his quip became an oft-used comic catchphrase that many people mistakenly assume came from one of Weissmuller's Tarzan movies."^[10]

Wikiquote has quotations related to I, Robot… You, Jane.

• "I, Robot... You, Jane" at IMDb